Saturday, December 28, 2019
Odds are who you know isnt going to help get you that job
Odds are who you know isnt going to help get you that jobOdds are who you know isnt going to help get you that jobDont depend on the people you know to get you the job you want. A new PayScale survey of 53,000 workers found that personal referrals from friends and former coworkers to be mostly ineffective and costly to both employees and employers.Survey only 34% of job referrals resulted in jobWhen you send out a reference request, dont expect it to lead to a job offer - only about one-third of employed workers surveyed said that they had been the recipient of one. The most common type of job referral - with 41% of employees being the recipient of one - came from a family member or close friend.While its common for managers to reach out to personal networks of who they know for job leads, the surveys findings challenge the fairness and efficacy of such a decision. The survey found that referrals from friends and families resulted in less engaged employees who said they were less satisfied with their employer and had worse relationships with their managers than business referrals. The finding suggests that a sign of professional investment could be in someone you dont personally know reaching out to you on LinkedIn or cold-calling you for a job.As a job seeker leveraging your friends and families for leads, you should also be cautious about how personal referrals can impact you once you get the job offer. You may think that being friends with the CEO can get you a better salary offer, but the survey found that personal referrals were offered an average salary that was $1,600 a year less than those who were referred by a business contact.Job referrals disproportionately help white menNot only are referrals found to be ineffective, they are also found to decrease diversity. At worst, they can be discriminatory. If you want a diverse workforce, you should not be relying on job referrals to find candidates.The survey found that white men overwhelmingly benefited the most from this practice.The survey calculated that out of every 100 employees referred, 44 of them will be white men, 22 will be white women, 18 will be men of color and only 16 will be women of color, holding-gesellschaft constant industry, location, and other relevant variables.The survey also found that the salary offers resulting from job referrals helped men more than women. While referred men could expect an $8,200 salary increase, the average women could only expect to receive a $3,700 salary increase.How to combat referral hiring biasInclusive hiring means examining every part of the hiring process for gaps to improve. If you are not getting the range of candidates needed to get a diverse workforce, its up to you the manager to find the demographics being overlooked.As journalist and managing expert Stacy-Marie Ishmael put it, If youre a white dude, its extremely likely that most of the people you know socially and professionally are also white dudes. And sinceso much o f hiring is about referrals, guess who ends up being recommended first?To combat this bias, Ishmael advises employers to actively search beyond personal pipelines for new talent Attend job fairs that specifically target people from underrepresented groups. Sponsor the conferences that are aimed at encouraging minorities in technology and media. Be present, be sincere, and be prepared to put money and time into the work.
Monday, December 23, 2019
These 4 supercool future jobs dont exist yet (but probably will by 2030)
These 4 supercool future jobs dont exist yet (but probably will by 2030)These 4 supercool future jobs dont exist yet (but probably will by 2030)What if I told you that nearly 85 percent of jobs that will exist in 2030 havent even been invented yet? Impossible, right? Well, not at all, according to a last years report by Dell Technologies and Institute for the Future (IFTF).If their conclusions are anything to go by, were going to need to find answers to a great number of difficult questions really fast.And the most important of ansicht has to be What are going to be the coolest jobs that dont exist yet? Well, I picked these four. What do you think?1. Commercial Space PilotSince being a space cowboy isnt a possibility yet, this one had to top my list. Sure, engineering is cool and all but nothing compares to actually steering the damn thing.With SpaceX advancing space travel faster than we could imagine a decade ago, it wont be long before were going to see commercial space flights on a daily basis.Certain situations will still require human pilots.And yes, much of these jobs will probably remain automated. When you take Falcon Heavy, for instance, its hard to imagine us going back to manned spacecrafts we dreamed up decades ago.Still, there are limits to AI that arent going away anytime soon. Which means that certain situations will still require human pilots. Especially where lives of human passengers are involved. After all, good judgement in unexpected situations is something we wont be able to expect from AI anytime soon.2. AI LawyerAs people increasingly interact with AI services, were only beginning to fathom the world of implications for what happens when things go wrong.For instance, some time ago a self-driving Uber killed a woman in Arizona. Who was at fault there? Was it the company that made the car? Or the owner of the vehicle? Ultimately it could even be considered a suicide. The answer is, we dont know yet.In many ways, the world of Isaac Asimovs I, Robot is already here. Were going to need an army of AI lawyers to help us make sense of it.3. 3D Food Printer EngineerRemember that lab-grown burger everyone was buzzing about two years ago? If yes, you probably know it was crazy expensive back then. Well, last year its price dropped from $325,000 to $11.36. But thats not allKnow this the lab-grown burger is only the tip of the enormous iceberg called 3d printed food. And 3d printed food is going to change what we eat, big time.Because if not, were pretty much done for. The global population is platzdeckchen to reach 9 billion by 2050 - at which point agricultural systems will be unable to supply food for everyone.3d printed food is going to change what we eat, big time.As far as anyone knows, the technology is already there. We can already print all kinds of processed food, with cakes and candy being the easiest of them all. But there are many others we still cannot do. And were still looking for the right ways to use this te chnology.We need 3D food printer engineers to help us figure out a way to feed this enormous mass of people. You could say theyre the superstar chefs of tomorrow. What? You dont think chefs are cool? Not even Gordon Ramsay? Get out of hereOh and theres an enormous amount of money to be earned there too4. Augmented Reality ArchitectDo you know that nifty IKEA app for your phone that lets you see IKEA furniture as if it was already in your room (assembled)? Pretty cool, right?This is what they call augmented reality. Its like reality, but better.Now try to think bigger. What if it wasnt just a clunky app in your phone. What if everyone was wearing glasses or contact lenses that would allow them to see IKEA furniture everywhere they go. And what if it wasnt just IKEA furniture.Imagine you could design what people see when they look at the world.This is what the worlds going to be like pretty soon, its already coming. Whats it going to look like can very well be up to you.Imagine you co uld design what people see when they look at the world. Everything from the navigation arrow that shows you directions to your destination, through to psychedelic visions in the sky.Now, thats what I call coolYou still have enough time to change careers and do something more future-proof. Check out these 10 good reasons to change careers in your 20s.Share Your Feedback or Ideas in the Comments
Wednesday, December 18, 2019
AM Needs MEs
AM Needs MEs AM Needs MEs AM Needs MEsWhen I started working in additive manufacturing three years ago, I thought 3-D printing of metals would be easy because I had worked with 3-D printed plastics for nearly two decades. I could leidlage have been mora wrong. AM is rewriting the rules of how we design, make, and qualify partes, and 3-D metal printing needs all the help it can get from mechanical engineers.For starters, mechanical engineers have traditionally designed parts by selecting a material with the best known properties (based on how it welches processed and heat treated) and then creating the shape they want.With additive manufacturing, the process is reversed. We print the shape that we want, and then we relieve stress, heat treat, age, or anneal the part until we get the material we want.The process sounds simple, but it is elend. The thermal cycling that 3-D printed metallic parts see during the layer-by-layer melting and fusion process, be it by laser or electron beam, h as a huge influence on the microstructure, which in turn affects the material properties. So, the part that we thought we had designed and engineered for specific strength and mechanical properties is not necessarily the part we getor it may be, depending on how it was made and post-processed. Because there are no good models to predict any of this, companies are currently treating each part as a one off, which equates to extensive testing and verification for each part made by additive manufacturing, which is neither cost effective nor an efficient use of resources.Residual stresses accumulated in this titanium part during the build and caused the material to rip itself from the build plate. stellung Penn State CIMP-3DSo why should we, as mechanical engineers, care about this? The answers simple every step of the process has numerous unknowns right now, and the tools, methods, and fundamental understanding needed to answer these questions do not exist. In short, MEs have a lot of w ork to do to help additive manufacturing reach its full potential.Even though manufacturers have been selling powder-bed fusion and directed energy deposition systems for several years, we leise do not really know exactly what is going on in these machines as the parts are being made. Modeling laser-powder interactions is difficult, especially since the physics and heat transfer phenomena are not fully understood in AM systems, particularly powder-bed fusion systems.The models and simulations that have been created are computationally expensive and still undergoing validation and verification. Few can simulate a full part through its entire build process. Engineers trying to model and simulate 3-D metal printing using existing finite element analysis packages, such as Nastran or Abaqus, need billions of elements and billions of time steps, which invariably crash the software for even simple part geometries.Even if you can predict the thermal history the part experiences during a bui ld, that is only half the problem. Models are needed to predict the residual stresses that will result and distortions that will occur, and estimate what the resulting microstructure is going to beall of which will change for different process parameter settings, build orientations, and metallic alloys and powder parameters including particle size, distribution, and morphology.Finally, because these AM processes are not well understood, we do not have any good tools for designing build supports in powder bed systems that can anchor the part to the build plate and counteract the thermal stresses that develop as the part is built up layer by layer. Based on our experience in the CIMP-3D lab at Penn State, at least 80 percent of build failures in powder bed fusion systems result from poorly designed support structures, yet analytical tools to optimize supports and corresponding build orientation of the part are limited at best. Polymer 3-D printing systems can use supports to counterac t gravity and to ensure a successful build, but polymer supports are water soluble and easy to remove. elend so when 3-D printing metalssupports anchoring the part to the build plate must be removed by cutting, grinding, and other labor-intensive processes.Parts want to curl up (like a potato chip) during a build and have been known to tear themselves from the build plate, particularly titanium parts fabricated using laser-based powder-bed fusion. There are ways to overcome this, but the process requires a lot of trial and error right now, which is expensive and time-consuming.custompagebreakBecause we do not have a complete understanding of what is going on inside an AM system as a part is being fabricated, design guidelines and design rules for AM are not readily available, or are nascent at best. Studies are starting to becomeavailable, for example, to understand what overhangs, wall thicknesses, and geometries can be easily built with (or without) supports. But these values vary by material (e.g., Ti64 vs. IN718)and by machine (e.g., an EOS system vs. an Arcam system).Private companies are spending millions of dollars of their own RD funding to create AM knowledge bases. Little of that knowledge, however, is being shared because it provides a competitive advantage for those companies that have it. Since anyone can buy an AM system, the real power lies in knowing how to use it. But everyone will benefi t if we collaborate and utilize resources like America Makes, the National Additive Manufacturing Innovation Institute, to share informationand advance AM.Engineers at Marshall Space Flight Center placed a 3D printed part made of nickel-chromium alloy powder, fused by a high-power laser. Images NASA/ Marshall Space Flight Center/Emmett GivenEngineering lightweight structures, designing sophisticated internal cooling passageways, or combining multi-part assemblies into a single printed component are just some of the benefits touted for additive manufacturing. Without the design rules, though, we do not have good computer-aided design tools to achieve those ends.Like 3-D printing technology, topology-optimization tools, for instance, have been around for many decades, yet we only now have the means to fabricate the intricate and organic shapes that provide optimal loading for minimum weight structures. GEs jet engine bracket challenge was a great example of how AM can be used to lightweight components.In 2013, NASA put an injector printed by selective laser melting through a test that generated 20,000 pounds of thrust. Images NASA/ Marshall Space Flight Center/Emmett GivenGE posted the design specifications and loading conditions for one of its jet engine brackets and crowd-sourced ideas to reduce its weight (https//grabcad.com/challenges/ge-jet-enginebracket-challenge). Nearly 700 entries from more than 50 countries were submitted within a few months, and the top ten designs were identifi ed, 3-D printed, and then tested. The winning br acket, designed by M Arie Kurniawan from Salatiga, Indonesia, weighed 0.72 pound, nearly 84 percent lighter than the original4.48-pound bracket made using subtractive manufacturing processes (gereports.com/post/77131235083/jet-enginebracket-from-indonesia-wins-3dprinting).Making the part using additive manufacturing is not straightforward either. A lot can go wrong during the build process. The 3dprintingindustry.com blog carried a three-part entry called, 3D Printing Titanium the Bin of Broken Dreams. In Part 3, Spencer Wright, a design expert at the organizational consultancy Undercurrent, describes six build failures, which he attributes to various causes, including the stripped-down simplicity of STL fi les and manufacturing tolerances too generous for larger parts. Mechanical engineers are salivating at the potential to put any material they want at any position they want in three-dimensional space with additive manufacturing to optimize its performance,custompagebreakbut the design tools and analyses do not yet existmore opportunities for mechanical engineers to help AM. The interactions between how you design a part and how you build it in an AM system are tightly coupled, yet not well understood. Engineers and designers are used to working with design allowables for materials made by known processes (such as casting, forging, and machining), but those design allowables do not yet exist for AM, nor do the Design for Additive Manufacturing guidelines that engineers need to successfully design parts for AM fabrication. A forthcoming issue of ASMEs Journal of Mechanical Design is gathering the current state of best practices, which are far more advanced for polymers than they are for metals.GE has received FAA approval of a 3-D printed housing for the T25 compressor inlet temperature sensor in the GE90-94B jet engine. The part is being retrofitted on Boeing planes. Image GE AviationEven if we can solve the design and material issues, manufacturers are sti ll hesitant to fully embrace the technology. High-end AM systems are still pricey (more than $500,000 in many cases), and machine operation and maintenance are costly. Maintenance agreements can run upwards of $50,000 per year for some systems, putting them well out of reach of many small and mid-size enterprises.The materials are also extremely expensive. This is particularly important for powder-bed systems as the build height defines the volume of powder needed. We once needed $5,000 of powder to build $200 of parts due to a tall part that we had designed, a mistake we do not want to repeat.Meanwhile, many AM systems lack the monitoring and sensing capabilities needed to control the processes, making it difficult to qualify equipment for production. It also makes it difficult to determine when and why a defect occurred if the process cannot be monitored. Mechanical engineers with expertise in sensing and controls have a wide-open playing field in this area.Heat treatment schedule s and post-processing considerations for AM-fabricated parts have received little attention to date from the broader mechanical engineering community, yet are crucial for achieving a functional AM part. The question about whether or not to apply hot isostatic pressing (HIP) to a 3-D printed part remains unanswered. Some manufacturers use HIP for all their AM parts to improve fatigue strength and reduce porosity, while others feel it is not needed or too expensive to use on every AM part.GE and GrabCAD asked designers to improve the bracket shown at top, which weighs almost 4.5 pounds. M Arie Kurniawans design using 3-D printing reduced weight by nearly 84 percent to 0.72 pound. Image GE While HIP may reduce internal porosity in some printed parts, it does little to the exterior surface finish, which can vary considerably based on build orientation and material. Identical parts built in the same orientation using two different materials will have two different surface finishes.This t hree-way interaction among part features, build orientation, and material choice is difficult enough as it is, but the extent of the interaction also varies by machine. A laser powder-bed fusion system will produce a very different part from that of an electron beam-based powder-bed system, everything else being equal.Finally, even though we can now realize complex internal features and passageways for conformal cooling and improved heat transfer, how do we know they printed as we designed them? We cant see them to inspect them so, new techniques for non-destructive inspection are needed to help certify parts. While X-ray computed tomography (CT) scanning shows promise, part size and material composition limit what this technology can do. CT scanning systems are still rather expensive, and companies certainly do not want to scan every part that they produce using AM.We need mechanical engineers to help rethink and develop new technology for inspection and certification of 3-D printe d parts without having to resort to printing 10 parts, testing nine of them, and keeping the last one for use, hoping it is as good as the ones we tested.The issues and challenges are far too numerous for one person or team to solve, and so we hope that more MEs will not dismiss AM outright as a new fad for 3-D printing and instead will talk to their colleagues in materials science, metallurgy, industrial engineering, and other fields to see what they can do to help. Additive manufacturing is poised to become as pervasive as computersused almost anywhere for almost anything. At home, if a handle or connector breaks, then we will just print a new one. At work, if we want to verify the fit and feel of a part that we designed, then we will just make one on our desktop 3-D printer we wont have to wait anymore for the prototype shop to make it.At school, we are already starting see a huge shift in how we integrate 3-D printing into the classroom. Entering freshmen are clamoring to access and use 3-D printing as soon as they come to campus they do not want to wait until their senior year to use 3-D printers on their capstone design projects. These students have had easy access to these capabilities in middle and high schools, and many mechanical engineering students are bringing (or building) their own 3-D printers and running them in their dorms and apartments. It may not be long before mechanical engineering students may be required to bring their own laptop and 3-D printer to campus their freshmen year.Most mechanical engineering curricula have not yet integrated 3-D printing and additive manufacturing into the classroom. We have a huge opportunity to reinvent how we teach and train mechanical engineers if we embrace AM.Its all there, and its never been more affordable and within reach. Low-end polymer 3-D printers now cost about the same as the original 2-D laser printers (which simply drew images on paper) did when they first came out. Prices of metallic AM sys tems are starting to drop as the field gets more competitive and patents expire, and everyone is trying to reduce material costs and offer a wider palette of materials to 3-D print.We just have to be willing, as mechanical engineers and educators training the next generation of mechanical engineers, to look beyond the hype to understand whats real, identify the possibilities, and help advance AM technology and education. Only then will additive manufacturing realize its full potential and help revitalize manufacturing in the United States.Our K-12 students are already doing it. Will we be ready when they go to college and enter the workforce?Timothy W. Simpson is a professor of mechanical and industrial engineering, and co-director of the Center for Innovative Materials Processing through Direct Digital Deposition (CIMP-3D) at the Pennsylvania State University.
Friday, December 13, 2019
Jolts of Inspiration for Your Job Search
Jolts of Inspiration for Your Job SearchJolts of Inspiration for Your Job SearchJolts of Inspiration for Your Job SearchThere are times in a job search when we need to give ourselves a kick in the buttor receive one from someone elseto motivate us to polish that resume, respond to a job posting, or reconnect with someone in our network who might know something about a potential employer.Some of you who have been out of work for months despite trying repeatedly will know what I mean The lack of success saps your enthusiasm and eats away at your confidence.Those are the times you can draw inspiration from short sayings that can lift you and help you see that something good can happen.Here are five quotations and how you can apply them to your job searchAction is the antidote to despair. - Joan BaezI read this in a blog post last week and it reminded me of a time many years ago when I felt I was in a career rut and needed to climb out and do something different. So, I came to realize th at the more job ads I answered, the more calls I made, the more networking I did, the better I felt, at least in the short-term. That helped sustain me until I actually climbed out of the rut and into a new job.Mens best successes come after their disappointments. - Henry Ward BeecherObviously, this quote comes from a time before the language became more egalitarian. But, as this might apply to the job search, you may go through unsuccessful interviews with several employers before you land the job thats right for you. And it may wind up being the best of all the jobs you were interested in. Been there myself.It was a high counsel that I once heard given to a young person, Always do what you are afraid to do. - Ralph Waldo EmersonLike it or not, we have to take risks sometimes, be it with a career change, a promotion, or even taking another job just to escape one we dont like. The lesson? Dont fear the unknown face it and give it your best shot.To climb steep hills requires a slow p ace at first. - ShakespeareBe patient in your job search dont rush into an opportunity if you dont feel its right for you. Although anyone whos been unemployed for many months might take issue with this, dont jump into a new job if you see a red flag or potential red flag. If its something you can live with comfortably, then proceed toward a decision.The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will. - Vince LombardiIts football season, so why not wrap this up with something from one of the greatest football coaches of all time. You may be one of the smartest, hardest-working people around, but its your confidence and determination that will likely dictate how far youll go in your career.
Sunday, December 8, 2019
The Secret of Production Manager Resume That No One Is Discussing
The Secret of Production Manager Resume That No One Is Discussing Therefore, a functional resume format highlighting all relevant abilities, qualifications, and experience can be quite powerful in making a manufacturing manager resume. Writing yur resume is about proving your skills, wisdom and experience make you the very best candidate for the job. With managing a huge number of people, strong leadership skills are expected to run the undertaking, which means communication is critical. Creating your resume is critical. The Foolproof Production Manager Resume Strategy Irrespective of the business, the manufacturing managers primary function is to make sure the efficient and timely production of products. The atmosphere can become quite stressful, so its up to the leader to motivate everyone on board to provide their finest efforts to meet deadlines and hit manufacturing quota. A functional manufacturing manager resume will also permit you to offer equal priority to the seve ral sections on your resume. It would become your job to deal with organizational and administrative tasks so the production would run smoothly and punctually. Troubleshoot production problems. Reduce and keep the price of production. Another feature of the apparel production managers responsibility is the characteristic of the item. The objective is to guarantee an efficient and productive manufacturing process which meets customer requirements. Committed to promoting the greatest standards and business values. fremdartig from leading the undertaking, IT Managers must analyze each stage of the project along with problem solve during if any issues arise. In summary, you need to position yourself as a leader of people, and a proprietor or manager of goods and processes. Sales people are going to be on the field promoting items that they believe best represents the business. Furthermore, you can look for product manager jobs on Monster. Organizations are constantly watching f or candidates having the experience to become their Operations Manager. Project managers offer assistance and advice to team members should they encounter problems. Roofing project managers liaise with different contractors on site to recognize the most suitable start date of an undertaking. A lot of people regularly compete for a work opening in operations management because its a great avenue to acquire into higher management position. Nowadays, hiring managers no longer need a traditional objective statement. Normally, hiring managers prefer the reverse chronological format because its much easier to read and find important key terms. To finish the work, project managers compile a team. The strategies and the supervisor resume objective samples given in this post will allow you to create one for your resume and place it on an increased aussicht of getting you an interview. The work description for any specific position gives you a clue as to whats important to the employer . Every recruiter knows youre likely to provide references should they request it so theres no cause for you to incorporate this line. 1 surprising and appealing point to have in your film resume would become your education. All servicing and maintenance work should also be put on the agenda as a portion of day-to-day operations. Irrespective of your degree of job practical experience, your resume structure is imperative to making your application stick out. The very first step is to choose the kind of resume that you want to create, and the way it will incorporate your preceding experience, job history and strong points, while reflecting the needs of the jobs applied for. To take up responsibility for a supervisor providing the capacity to enforce standards for the completion of a top quality operation. Back then it was simple to gather the information required for an invoice. Additional information on keywords and phrases are available below. If youd like to create a pr ofessional resume you can use for your application for a manager in any business or process, youve come to the appropriate post as weve gathered various manager resumetemplates and samplesthat youll be able to use as guides and references. Just take a peek at our all-inclusive guide for more information on ATS software, and the way to beat it. Secondly, you have to decide on a resume format appropriate for the manufacturing manager job application. Your manager resume must demonstrate your capability in this section of the webpage. An excellent sample manager resume will consist of keywords a couple of times throughout the document. Whether this Production Manager resume example was not sufficient for you, youre totally free to review a few other samples and templates from our website.
Tuesday, December 3, 2019
Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College Reviews & Guide
Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College Reviews & Guide The Upside to Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College Utilize our academic advisors resume templates to assist you. The resume isnt merely a document which contains your qualifications. Assisted in the evolution of advising plans. Compiled and organized college info and college-oriented filing and data systems. Academic resumes are not simple to combine because of their non-visual content type. See Appendix X for the whole policy. See Appendix VI for the whole policy. For the entire policy see Appendix V. The Honest to Goodness Truth on Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College A whole ansprechbar application includes these attachments. Everyone can say which he or she excelled at their final job. Our big variety of downloadable resume templates is totally free for all to use and a wonderful resource to kick off the writing process. Some might be dealin g with emotional, economic and societal issues that are more troublesome to tackle. The Ultimate Strategy to Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College If you wish to create your very own academic resume or any other forms of resume, you can use our resume samples as guides. If you choose to use high school info, make certain its really robust and appropriate content. Students are needed to check Blackboard for course activity information in case of a class cancellation. They are required to check Blackboard for course activity information in the event of a course cancellation. Facts, Fiction and Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College There are functions which are usually designated to an individual, while there are additional posts where you will need to apply through the aid of an academic resume. Dont forget that recruiters may see the name of the file that you send them and also bear in mind they get lots of resumes each and every day. If youre searching for an excellent academic advisor resume example, youve come to the proper spot. Until then, you dont have to mention. The Appeal of Rules for Resume Writing for a Academic Advisor at a College If a faculty member will be late or cannot meet a class due to an emergency, they will make every effort to have someone inform you. A certain level of creativity and latitude is needed. Landing an excellent internship for a college student is an excellent means to get prepared for the challenges of life after the university. You should be comfortable showing students their college and career alternatives, in addition to their financial choices as soon as it comes to pursuing their objectives. All expert organizations of which youre a member listed vertically. Schools regularly search for the best candidates that have an excellent balance between educational fundamentals and the perfect personality attributes. The greatest Academic Advisor resume objective i s one which is direct and straightforward. Academic advising is a procedure to help you make a plan to attain your academic and career targets.
Friday, November 29, 2019
Its not always them - Sometimes youre the toxic one
Its elend always them - Sometimes youre the toxic oneIts not always them - Sometimes youre the toxic oneWhen it comes to self-care, relationships of all types, and living a happier life, the talk of removing toxic people from yur life is common. Articles, books, and advice of all types encourage people to remove the bad vibes bad people, bad food, and bad habits. In truth, that advice is helpful. You only get one life, so subjecting yourself to toxicity is harmful no matter which form it takes. However, its not enough to remove the toxic people - you also need to be honest about your own toxic tendencies.People arent all good or all bad. People are complex. This means that even the best kind of people have the potential to be toxic to someone else. What is important is understanding what type of behavior is toxic, reflecting on your own potentially toxic behaviors, understanding that toxic relationships are everywhere, and realizing that its possible to change those behaviors. Somet imes its not them its you.Recognizing toxic behaviorThere arent many relationships that are effortless. Each person needs to give a little and take a little. Some give a little mora, while some take a little more. Where relationships get difficult is when toxic behavior becomes the norm. Its hard to realize who is being toxic if you dont know which behaviors are toxic to begin with. Here are some examples of toxic behaviorBeing controllingSelfishnessBeing defensiveManipulative behaviorGaslightingNegative talkAbuseThere are endless examples of each of these behaviors. Many times, toxicity is more subtle. Sometimes its not what you say - its how you say it that is toxic. Sometimes its how you treat others. Sometimes its your attitude that is toxic, even if its not aimed at the person who is being affected by it. Toxicity isnt always obvious its how you make the people around you feel and the vibes youre giving off.Self-realization and maturityIt can be hard to admit when youre the pr oblem. To realize youve played the victim instead of analyzing why others dont want to be around you. To admit you get more out of your relationships than you give back. To be honest about making excuses for why you did something wrong or selfish to someone else. However, self-realization is one of the biggest signs of maturity. It is hard apologizing, not getting defensive, and accepting that you hurt someone instead of claiming that you didnt. Being reactive is toxic listening and communicating is the mature and healthy response.There isa connection in our brains between our neurons and how we behave. This means its possible to rewire your brain to increase compassion and make new pathways in the brain between certain behaviors. It takes work to control the part of you that wants to get defensive, be reactive, say something hurtful, or do something selfish, but it is possible. The first step is being mature and making the effort to have some honest self-realization.Toxicity is eve rywhereToxicity exists in all relationships romantic relationships, friendships, family relationships, work relationships, etc. Its important to note that just because youre not toxic to your spouse, friends, or family doesnt necessarily mean youre not toxic to your co-workers, for instance. A toxic co-worker or manager might gossip, play favorites, or focus on blaming instead of helping.This can cause disengaged employeesor an unhappy work life, which is dangerous when employment is so important for a persons ability to live and provide. Family relationships can also be toxic, which can be hard since family is permanent, and it can be hard to walk away from a toxic family member. This leads many people to feel safe in being toxic to family since they may think they are not in danger of losing them.In reality, toxicity can happen in every type of relationship imaginable. And, just because youre not toxic to one person, or in one type of relationship, doesnt mean you cant be toxic in another. Its important to be sure youre being honest about your behavior and toxic tendencies in all of your relationships, and not just your friendships or your romantic relationships.Change is possibleNo one is perfect, and everyone has exhibited some toxic tendencies at some point in their life. Admitting that is a sign of maturity and self-realization, which is so important in changing toxic behavior. What is important to know, once youve realized when youre being toxic, is that change is possible. Stop gossiping, saying hurtful things, being selfish, being prideful, jumping to anger, or judging others. Stop expecting everything and giving nothing.While youre removing your own toxic behaviors, remove your toxic vices as well. Work on self-care, loving yourself, and realizing you dont have to be negative to demand respect. Work on being mindful, removing the toxic food and drinks from your life, and making healthy choices.Theres a reason why you might subject yourself to toxic a nd unhealthy foods, and it may be similar to why you subject yourself to toxic or unhealthy behaviors. Behaviors are learned. But that means they can be unlearned as well. Change is possible as long as you do the work.Admitting the problem is sometimes the hardest step. Realizing youre a toxic person to others doesnt mean youre the only one oftentimes it can be both people in a relationship. The advice that you always read about removing the toxic people from you life is still true. Sometimes, that person is you. It means removing your own toxic behavior in addition to removing the others in your life who are toxic.Its also about being better to yourself. How you talk to yourself, what you eat, how healthy your choices are, your mental health, and your own self-worth are all tied into why youre being toxic in the first place. Admitting when youre the toxic one is the first step. The next is to make the changes for those around you - and for you as well.This article was originally p ublished on YourCoffeeBreak.
Sunday, November 24, 2019
Body language pros on the ways your movements show stress
Body language pros on the ways your movements show stressBody language pros on the ways your movements show stressYou are careful with your email etiquette - always signing off kindly and professionally and never shooting off a passive-aggressive response after a cocktail- but what about the messages youre sending silently? While many professionals have mastered the fine art of exuding confidence during meetings and networking events, when youre faced with a stressful situation in the office, your body language might get the best of you.Career expert and founder of Comepelle Communications Nellie OBrien says these subconscious reactions account for 93% of the judgments people make about you- so if youre not paying attention, you should be. Its important to understand how suggestible your audience can be and how easily we are influenced by what we perceive visually, she explains. If you look credible, I believe what you are saying. If you appear passionate, I feel that passion. If yo u appear approachable, I like your message. If you look uncomfortable or doubtful, I am uncomfortable and doubtful about you and what you are saying.Here, body language pros analyze the signals you might not realize youre sendingYour manager just added another task to your overflowing responsibilitiesUgh. You already felt bombarded with deadlines and meetings, and now your manager is throwing yet another deliverable into your hat. When this happens, you will probably suddenly feel intensely overwhelmed, resulting in your head and shoulder dropping, as though the actual weight has been added to your back, OBrien says. You are now in a physically weak sttte which makes you appear and feel whiny and/or easily manipulated - neither of which is very pretty and both will hurt your case, she shares.You might also audibly sign to release the anxiety but OBrien challenges professionals to do the opposite Because you need to debate deadlines or your current capacity, you have to build yourse lf stronger, which reaps respect. Inflate, gather and channel your energy to a strong position of strength and credibility. Bring your chest up and allow the air to fill you and raise you to the height you deserve so that you can make a reasonable case for how the situation might be resolved, she says.Youre missing an important social event to meet a deadline at workThe first date with someone promising - or an important date night you promised to your partner ages ago. Your daughters or nieces playoff soccer game. A happy hour gathering with a long lost friend you backpacked through Europe with a decade ago. When you are looking forward to a special social event and then your boss asks you to stay late to finish an ASAP project, life coach Ellyn Schinke, MS, says youre likely to pace, hunch, tap your foot, stare out the window, cross your arms and fake your smile. These are all examples of how your body is exuding whats running through your head. Youre experiencing anxiety, boredo m and potentially even displeasure and frustration in this situation and are attempting to mask that displeasure through distraction, she explains.The task has to get done - and you want to at least make an appearance for your friends or families. Instead of accepting defeat, Schinke says to buckle down and prioritize work so you can zip through your deliverables instead of fidgeting. Minimizing these repetitive and distracting movements will allow you to focus on the activity at hand at potentially make it to that social event sooner, she adds.Your coworker just dropped the ballSure, your reaction to an undependable colleague highly depends on the dynamic of your working relationship and your personality. No matter what though? Youre likely, well, pissed. After all, when someone promises to complete their end of the bargain and dont, youre left with more work on your plate or a disapproving boss that blames you for missing a deadline, too. When this happens, you can pretty much gu arantee feelings of anger, annoyance, and frustration, causing you to boil over, become passive-aggressive and putting you in danger of a major meltdown.OBrien says your mouth will turn down, your jaw will tense, youll close or put your hands in your pocket. You might even hold onto something tightly, pace or fidget. But when you feel your inner monster beginning to rear its head, dont allow an outburst to diminish your power. If you freak out, OBrien says your coworker will immediately be on the defensive, and now you are both in a closed position physically and mentally.Instead do as your mom always instructed and count to ten. Breathe, straighten your spine, open your hands to signify honesty and reason. Then, OBrien suggests relaxing your face and responding calmly so you can find a resolution and move forward.You had a tense conversation with a clientConsider the last time you had a heated discussion with someone you love. Did you move around a lot? Sigh? anflug your face? Rub your hands? Maybe you even teared up. Though professional in nature, the matters of relationships remain the same with a client Schinke says that when put on the spot to deliver bad news or negotiate a difficult agreement, youll turn to those same coping mechanisms. Youre experiencing nervousness or stress in the situation and youre attempting to soothe your nerves through the use of repetitive behaviors, she explains.Instead of allowing your discomfort to reign over your actions, Schinke says to remain still and continue to breathe. This focus will help you from appearing out of control or heavily impacted, giving you the platform to stand your case and make progress.
Thursday, November 21, 2019
5 strategies that top performers use to overcome failure
5 strategies that top performers use to overcome failure5 strategies that top performers use to overcome failureLets face it. Despite all the rage about fail fast and fail forward in Silicon Valley, one fact is undeniable Failure sucks. Its painful. Its embarrassing. When it happens, you want to get into the fetal position and hide underneath your blankets.Failure is also ubiquitous. Even top performers- people we tend to put on a pedestal- got to where they are after failing, failing, and failing some mora. Behind the glamour is the font of messy and imperfect reality that confronts us all.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moraOn theFamous Failurespodcast, I interview the worlds most interesting people about the failures theyve had in their lives and what they learned from them. Based on these interviews, Ive culled together five strategies that top performers use to cope with failur e. As Rocky Balboa said, Life is elend about how hard you hit. Its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.When you inevitably get hit, try one (or more) of these tactics to keep moving forward.1. Isaac Lidsky Quieting your inner criticIsaac Lidskyis an entrepreneur, bestselling author, and coveted speaker. He was a child television star, appearing as series regular Weasel on NBCs Saved By The Bell The New Class. He left his acting career and went on to graduate from Harvard at 19 with an honors degree in mathematics and computer science. He returned to Harvard to study law and became the only blind rolle to clerk on the U.S. Supreme Court (for Justices Sandra Day OConnor and Ruth Bader Ginsburg).Isaac was born with Retinitis Pigmentosa, a rare degenerative disease of the retina. From age 12 to 25, he slowly lost his sight. Using insights from his experiences, he authored the New York Times bestseller,Eyes Wide Open.Heres how Isaac copes with the debilitating inner cr itic that lives inside of our headsWhen I think about our fear of failure and ongoing struggle in the face of big challenges, I think about Teddy Roosevelts brilliant remarks about the critic and the strong man. To my mind, Roosevelts critic embodies our fear of failure, a very pernicious force, this nasty voice in our mind that tells us what we cant do. It tells us what other people are going to think and say about us, and it can be really debilitating.If you listen to the critic in your mind long enough and if youre not careful, you will believe him. Then the criticism becomes self-fulfilling. Once you believe him, it brings about the result you hoped to avoid in the first instance.Think about someone whos a dancer, lets say, who loves their craft and finds joy in it, but is so terrified of the nasty reviews of both that internal critic and external critics, that it keeps them off the stage. They lose the joy in dancing and stop doing it altogether. To me, thats the allegorical he art-breaking example of this dynamic at work.Taking control of your reality is understanding that these nasty messages youre getting from yourself, and this barrage of cues youre getting from what you see around you about what success should look like and what you should be doing, are really just noise. They dont need to govern your life, your behavior, or your decisions, unless you choose to let them do so.I think fundamentally it is all choice. We choose in every single moment how we want to live our lives and who we want to be.2. Adam Grant Mindset and Time TravelAdam Grantis an organizational psychologist, the top-rated professor at Wharton, a coveted speaker, and a prolific author. He is a leading expert on how we can find motivation and meaning, and live more generous and creative lives.Hes the host of the newWorkLife podcast.Heres how Adam copes with failureI think theres a battle between two reactions to failure. One is the defensive, self-protective, this is something that I never want to experience again so Im not going to try anything hard, or new, again. The other is the curious, the pro-active, the gritty, the learning-oriented, fill-in-your-blank set of reactions.What I try to do is choose the latter. Its easier to do that now, knowing that Ive been through it a bunch of times. I dont start out with confidence that Im a good teacher, a good writer, or a good researcher. But I do have confidence that Im good at learning things and Im motivated to get better.In the long run, the person I want to be is the person who says, I didnt give up at something I might have been able to improve at, and eventually excel at.Mental time travel is also helpful. Zooming out, I know that next month, this failure is not going to sting as much as it does today. In a year, I might have even forgotten it, if I look at my past experience. So in the long run, how will I want to have reacted? Its like stepping on the accelerator of the learning reaction.3. Daniel Pink Mea n ReversionDaniel Pinkis the author of seven groundbreaking books, including the 1 New York Times bestsellers,A Whole New MindandDrive. His newest book,When The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing, was published in January 2018 and became an instant New York Times bestseller. Heres how Dan uses mean reversion to deal with failureThis is going to sound ridiculously hyper-rational, but its truthful I believe in mean reversion. Things will go up and things go down, but ultimately everything reverts to the mean. If you have some things that are working really well, at some point somethings not going to work well. If you have things that are not working very well, at some point, somethings going to work well.As a consequence, I try not to get too disappointed when things go south. And if something goes well, I feel better than if it doesnt go well, but its not as if Im celebrating and feeling a sense of euphoria. Its more like, Okay, thats good. Im glad. Then I move on.With mean reversi on, you dont get too bummed out by the lows and you dont get too pumped up by the highs. You just do the best work you can in every circumstance. You focus on the work rather than on how the outcome of the work makes you feel.4. Bea Arthur Just do itA child of entrepreneurs,Bea Arthurhas used her tenacity and creativity to become a successful therapist, entrepreneur, and media personality. As a celebrated woman in tech, shes been a TedX speaker, Forbes writer, and the first black woman admitted to Y Combinator, the worlds most prestigious start-up incubator. Heres how Bea finds the motivation to move forward in the face of failureMy family is from goldkste in West Africa. Both of my parents are entrepreneurs. My older sister is an entrepreneur. Africa is the perfect place for the startup mindset because theres very little infrastructure and the idea of starting something and it being orderly just isnt as big. If I walked into a bureau and said, Heres my application for an LLC, that paper isnt going anywhere. So, naturally, theres a by-any-means-necessary kind of mindset. You do what you have to do to make it work.Ill say that Im really blessed to have this fearlessness. I wasnt scared because I didnt know to be scared. Dont do too much homework. Dont listen to too many podcasts. Just do it. You can follow all the formulas you want, but the unique power of execution is in you and the way you do things. Be flexible and dont be too bull-headed.5. Gretchen Rubin Find the fun in failureGretchen Rubinstarted her career in law- including clerking for Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day OConnor- before stopping everything to become a writer. Though the transition was pitted with failure, it turned out to be one of the best decisions she made. Not only has she written three New York Times Bestsellers- Better Than Before,The Happiness Project, andHappier at Home- shes also built an enormous readership, sold more than three million books, and started a popular weekly podcas t called Happier with Gretchen Rubin.This is a mantra that has really helped me Enjoy the fun of failure. I think people sometimes have this feeling of shame when they fail. Like, they want to pretend it didnt happen. So, enjoying the fun of failure is trying to recast failure in a more lighthearted way. Dont try to ignore or re-categorize the failure- own it and have fun with it.Failure is part of success- if youre not failing, youre not trying hard enoughnot pushing the boundaries far enough. If Im just doing everything the way Ive always done it, and everythings just kind of trickling along, thats not a good sign.This article first appeared on Ozanvarol.com.Ozan Varol is a rocket scientist turned law professor and bestselling author.Click hereto download a free copy of his e-book, The Contrarian Handbook 8 Principles for Innovating Your Thinking. Along with your free e-book, youll get the Weekly Contrarian - a newsletter that challenges conventional wisdom and changes the way we look at the world (plus access to exclusive content for subscribers only).
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